Semantics and being helpful
First off, the A/C is on the fritz here in the office. I feel like a menopausal woman having hot flashes with all the on/off it’s been doing today. So if this post leans towards the negative, chalk it up to that.
As I posted earlier, A received no study materials beyond a snappy cockpit poster when he was hired by XJet. Which was good for me b/c it took away the “I’m studying” excuse for not getting things done b/f he was due to leave. So last night, getting into bed, he says to me “Oh, I forgot to tell you- I got the call from XJ”. Hmm, the call? I started racking my brain- were we expecting a call? Was there a reason they were calling? The Call sounds pretty ominous. “A call” sounds friendly, chatty, a reminder, but “The call” sounds scary, weighted, so important that it needs to be written as THE CALL. Husbands, please keep in mind the semantics of “a call” vs. “THE CALL” to avoid freaking out your wives.
So what was this mysterious call about? XJet was calling to a)verify that he would be starting on 4/2 and b)let him know that they were mailing him out his study materials. Um, yeah. So he can get them 2 days before he gets there? Seriously, why didn’t they save the cost of mailing all those out and just hand them out at training. Maybe, with the money they saved, they could have sprung for hotel rooms with mini-fridges for the duration of training. Instead of forcing everyone to eat out for 6 weeks straight. I’m just sayin’…
Seems like a rash of women on the jetgirls.net forum (formerly pilotfamilies.com) have been having husband issues this week. Must be spring fever kicking in or something. I’ve been posting b/c I actually feel like I have something to contribute beyond “wow, sucks to be you right now”. It makes me feel good to actually be able to give some useful advice. I’m sure everyone will weather their rough spots just fine.
I did it!
A took M and I up for the first time yesterday. We went in an Archer III. And it wasn’t as scary as I thought it was going to be. And I didn’t get sick either, although I have a few queasy episodes when we did sharp turns. In fact, I wasn’t freaked out at all. It was interesting to see Jax from the air and I was able to identify all of the roads and stuff easily. We flew over the apt, work, preschool (M’s request), the beach. I think it was reassuring that he knew the area so well. And it was cool to see the other GA planes around. M’s favorite part was when we overtook a bird in the air. I’m actually looking forward to going up again.
M did get sick twice- thank goodness for ziplock bags. He was sitting in the backseat and we think it was the not looking out the window enough and focused too much on watching the GPS. We landed and walked around at another airport for a bit and he felt better in the fresh air. But shortly after take-off he was ill again. Guess we better invest in some dramamine. And consider mechanics school instead of flight schools.
A is home for another week. Nice to have the extra time with him, although it does mean he’ll miss out on M’s birthday party in two weeks. It’s good that he’ll be here for my surgery tomorrow though. That’s a good trade off. We went out with other pilot friends Saturday night- it was fun and they did in fact talk about more than just aviation.
Trust
A called and told me that he has an appt today to go get checked out to rental a plane. He wants to take us up before he goes to training. I have to admit that, despite my pride in him and my belief that he is a great pilot, I haven’t been able to get myself to actually go up with him. Despite my belief in the immersion methods of the school, his reassuring ability to rattle off complicated systems stuff and checklists, and the fact that he’s been able to teach this stuff to a bunch of students, I’ve never felt comfortable enough to actually get up there myself. Maybe if there were two pilots up there in case something happened… But I’m going to face my fears and do it. I told him he’d better be sure to pack some windex, paper towels and airsick bags for when I inevitably vomit during a spin demo. At least A and M are super excited. I’m sure we’ll be fine, I just have to get over this hurdle.
It hit me today as I was celebrating that it was the end of the workday that he really was going and might not be here at the start of the workday. I’m not worried- he was a batchelor for 5 years and I a single parent for 1 (even longer in practice)- I’m know we can each get by just fine. I’m going to have to work hard to keep my control freak tendencies in check while he’s gone. Trust that everything is going good, trust that he can accomplish this, and trust that he can maintain his trust in me as well. His two previous long term relationships ended with a breach of trust and that’s something we’ve been working on overcoming for a long time. At least I recognize that this will be a challenge and not just a breeze through. And I trust that we can get through it and come out stronger.
The aftermath
Well, it hasn’t been anything so dramatic as an aftermath, but it’s a good, catchy title.
I’ll start with prior to the interview, sunday. A had to work a 1/2 day and then we procrastinated. Went to the mall, paid some bills, went out for ice cream… Finally around 7 or so we got down to business. I ws up until 10:30 or so doing internet searches for school phone numbers, zip codes and the like while he updated his log book. Then I went to bed and he continued updating his logbook. At about midnight he woke me up to put in the final tallies into his resume and flight grid.
A short 3.45 hours later, he was up to prep for his flight to Houston. Since our bathroom is off our bedroom, I was awake as well. He was out the door about 4:45am and except for a text msg around 11am, that was the last I heard from him for 12 hours. Somehow we both made it through the day on about 4 hours sleep.
I can’t say much about what he said went on during the interview. Honestly, when he starts talking about aviation stuff, I tune out and just listen for important cue words. It’s much the same way I tune our preschooler’s incessent talking and listen for important word combinations like flush-toy-toilet or throw-cat-balcony.
What I heard of the interview would be- “Well first I filled out a lot of paperwork, then I waited around. Then I got called into the first room with a Captain and he asked me blah, blah, blah and I answered blah, blah, blah and he told me I told him more than he needed. Then I went into another room and the guy asked me blah, blah, blah…” Not an effective gouge. But whatever he said must have worked.
The big question now is, when is his starting date? We don’t know. They are trying to do a double class starting on Monday (that’s 4 days from now) but they aren’t sure they can get approval. So they will let us know by Saturday if he has to be there for Monday’s class. Otherwise it’ll be the following Monday, the 2nd. Yep, ok, glad to hear the run around continues on the regional level. So we are planning that he’ll be there monday because it is inevitable that he will have to be if we don’t plan for it. AND they are revamping the course, so they sent him home with a fine looking poster of the cockpit, but no other study materials. I guess they can’t fault them if they don’t have their flows and whatnot memorized prior to class. I’m sure he’ll do fine.
Yesterday we hit our first snag too. As it turns out, I have to have another procedure done requiring anesthesia next week. Well, since A won’t be here, I have to find someone else to be with me for the day, drive me there and back and pick up M from school. I’ve got AAA for the car, the maintance staff for the apt, babysitters for the kid, but no friends who are free during the day. So I’m working on finding a generous spirit to help me out. At least if he were on a schedule, I’d be able to reschedule for a day he was home, but nope, this has to come up right when he’s leaving for 6 weeks. Thanks Murphy’s Law! I <3 you too.
 At least I am able to get some satisfaction out of compling a big list of to-do’s for him to complete before he leaves.
I’m so proud of him for working so hard to get us to this point. I knew it was going to be a good decision for us to come to FL.